How to cry
One of the most important ways to release pent-up emotion is to cry. It’s a very natural process, but many of us – especially men – find it extremely hard to do.
Realistically, crying is good for you – we all have tear ducts for a reason – crying keeps the eyes moistened and healthy. It relaxes the muscles, lowers blood pressure and acts almost as a natural tranquiliser, but there are both good and bad ways to cry.
Crying on your own is seen as negative, as it doesn’t allow you to reveal or fathom what you’re upset about – it has you dwelling on your fears and negative emotions, which makes it more unlikely for you to work things through.
It’s far healthier to cry with someone who can talk you through your feelings, so you can make sense of what’s going on. If you find this hard to do and need to sob in solitude, make sure you talk to someone shortly afterwards about what’s making you feel so bad. This helps to release the build-up of any tension.
Crying is not good for us, however, if it’s being used to replace the emotion we’re supposed to be feeling for a given situation. For instance, if you’re angry or stressed about something, and your usual response is to cry, then this won’t get to the root of the problem, it will simply distract it.
Remember, crying is an expression of sadness or grief, acknowledging some form of loss in our lives. For anger, it’s a very different response that’s required, the healthy expression of which we’ll look at next time.