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The Magnificent 7 Benefits of Being Present in February
There is only one time that is important – NOW! It is the most important time because it is the only time that we have any power.” Leo Tolstoy
“I never think of the future. It comes around soon enough.” Albert Einstein
“The secret of health for both mind and body is not to mourn for the past, nor to worry about the future, but to live the present moment, wisely and earnestly.” Buddha
I have written quite a bit about being present and how it can help us live with greater balance, and this month is no exception. I’ll be in India when you receive this newsletter, so it’ll be just as vital for me to remember to take a dose of my own invaluable medicine while I’m away. Happy reading!
Being present is quite hard to keep up, as we can slip back into NOT being present all too often..…and that really is OK. By simply accepting that you’re not present when this happens, that is, not beating yourself up about it, you’ll feel better and more relaxed. It will then be easier to slip back into the present moment once again when you’re ready.
Just as with anything, going for perfection often leads to anxiety. Going for consistency, though, (thereby improving your consistency gradually, so you slip back into old habits less often) is much more useful. Also, being present isn’t a magic pill that will solve all your problems or “fix you”. Just as with regular exercise, however, it can be helpful in a number of ways: –
1. Improved social skills
This may be one of the first things you discover when you start experimenting with being present. If you have struggled with being nervous or shy in the past, and have admitted to never knowing what to say in conversations, then finding presence is one solution.
When you are present, your head is no longer filled with past scenarios (“what did she mean when she said that?”) or future scenarios (“what will he think if I say this?”). You let go of your self-consciousness. You are just there. With your attention focused outward towards the person you are interacting with, you go with it, allowing the flow to come from you.
Generating rapport is great a way to tap into your presence in conversations. Establishing rapport means you need to start by telling yourself you are meeting one of your best friends. You’ll find your interaction then stems from a connecting frame of mind instead of a nervous one. When you are with your best friends you are probably not thinking ahead that much. You are just enjoying the interaction, the present moment and the whole of you allows everything to flow naturally. Presence can also help you with your listening. It helps you to lessen the bad habit of thinking about the future and what you should say next while trying to listen. If you are present and really there while listening then that will also come through in your body language, which gives the person talking the sense and feeling that you are really listening to what they are saying. Being present also improves your ability to be ‘in the zone’ and focus clearly, allowing you to tune out possible interruptions or distractions in your surroundings.
2. Improved creativity
If you write, or do any other type of creative work, you may have found that your best work flows out of you when you are not thinking that much. You just write, paint, make or play. You enter a state where things just come to you. Then later you find that you come back to edit your work.
This one is linked to the first point, in that writing is quite similar to having a conversation. When you are present in a conversation or while writing, it’s often best not to think too far ahead or you start to become self-conscious, second-guessing yourself. You create a string of mental blocks that hinder your flow, completely stopping your creativity in its tracks.
3. You appreciate your world more
One of big advantages of becoming more present in your everyday life is that you decrease the amount of analysing and labelling you do to the things or people in your surroundings. You find that you don’t judge as much.
This may sound a little strange, but in the moments when you are present the ordinary world becomes much more interesting and wonderful. Colours can seem brighter. You see more life in the trees, in nature and in people. You see the wonder of all our man-made gadgets and techno-stuff. Things that often seem most common, routine and boring, become totally fascinating and something we can really begin to appreciate.
It’s as though you are observing your world with more clarity and curiosity. Like a little kid discovering things while they still feel fresh……long before all the walking, talking and growing pains take over, putting labels on everything as a result of years of conditioning and reinforcement.
4. Stress release.
When you are present there is a certain stillness and sense of feeling centred inside. You calm down. If you are feeling stressed during your normal day, let this go by taking a few deep belly breaths and focusing on them for a minute or two. This breathing from the belly helps to calm us down in a physical way, and by focusing simply on the in and out-breaths, you connect to the present moment instead of the past or future scenarios that are making you feel stressed.
5. Less worrying and overthinking
If you are a chronic over-thinker who keeps going round and round in circles in your mind before you ever get anything done, then being present is a great release from that habit. I’m not saying that you won’t slip back into over-thinking, but being present for a while can certainly help you. It can allow you to stop worrying about what may happen by taking some action to get started.
6. Openness
This is perhaps the biggest benefit of all. Being present removes the labels you put on people and things – temporarily – and opens you up to see and experience things without your pre-conceived notions. I think this is a big part in how being present helps you in conversations and with your creativity. You are open to new things as you remove the barriers within your mind. Things flow easier through you without all that other stuff getting in the way. You make things easy on yourself, you often get better results at the same time.
7. Playfulness
When you are present, you can sense a feeling of playfulness arise. This makes it easier to do all manner of things. When you see things from a playful point of view, things become less of a struggle created from within. You let go of that heavy, over-thinking frame of mind. Not everything will necessarily become super-easy instantly, but you’ll certainly find many things becoming much more enjoyable and a whole lot easier to tackle. They become lighter and less of a burden. Children are so much more present and playful than we are – by simply choosing to connect with the present (because it really is a mere matter of choice), we, adults, can also find real meaning and pleasure in all that we do.
So, have loads of fun while I’m away and I’ll see you again in March!!