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Listening…a dying art?
The Chinese verb ‘to listen’ is composed of 5 characters: the ear, you, the eyes, undivided attention and the heart. This translation suggests that listening is much more than the simple instinctive function of hearing words or sounds. In fact, the true art of listening involves all our capacities, in other words, our entire being.
When we listen with our whole selves, we do so much more than just hear the words being said. We become aware of what is being communicated at all levels – we are listening intently with our head and our heart and with this level of attention, we are absolutely validating the person we are with.
Now this may seem like a whole lot of hard work for every time we communicate, but true understanding can never be achieved without it. When two people are really listening to understand each other, and I don’t mean just exchanging views, they will be listening in precisely this way – with every part of their being: mind, body, heart and soul, fully aware of each other’s vulnerabilities.
Judgement will have been suspended and all advice given a giant heave-ho, with both these irritants being replaced with the authenticity we need for excellent, almost intuitive communication. With greater awareness, spontaneity and trust, we will have more open and candid conversations with each other, helping us to grow individually and together, whichever direction we wish to take.